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tion of god you could have。 so what you end up with is that those he has spoke to are the ones that must of needed it the worst。 thats not a easy thing to accept。 particularly as it might apply to someone like loretta。 but then maybe we are all of us lookin through the wrong end of the glass。 always have been。
aunt carolyns letters to harold。 the reason she had them letters was that he had saved em。 she was the one raised him and she was the same as his mother。 them letters was dogeared and tore and covered with mud and i dont know what all。 the thing about them letters。 well for one thing you could tell they were just country people。 i dont think hed ever been out of irion county； let alone the state of texas。 but the thing about them letters was you could tell that the world she was plannin on him in back to was not ever goin to be here。 easy to see now。 sixty some years on。 but they just had no notion at all。 you can say you like it or you dont like it but it dont change nothin。 ive told my deputies more than once that you fix what you can fix and you let the rest go。 if there aint nothin to be done about it it aint even a problem。 its just a aggravation。 and the truth is i dont have no more idea of the world that is brewin out there than what harold did。
of course as it turned out he never e home at all。 there was not nothin in them letters to suggest that she had reckoned on that possibility。
well； you know she did。 she just wouldnt of said nothin about it to him。
ive still got that medal of course。 it e in a fancy purple box with a ribbon and all。 it was in my bureau for years and then one day i took it out and put it in the drawer in the livin room table where i wouldnt have to look at it。 not that i ever looked at it； but it was there。 harold didnt get no medal。 he just e home in a wooden box。 and i dont believe they had gold star mothers in the first world war but if they had of aunt carolyn would not of got one of them either since he was not her natural son。 but she should of。 she never got his war pension neither。
so。 i went back out there one more time。 i walked over that ground and there was very little sign that anything had ever took place there。 i picked up a shellcasin or two。 that was about it。 i stood out there a long time and i thought about things。 it was one of them warm days you get in the winter sometimes。 a little wind。 i still keep thinkin maybe it is somethin about the country。 sort of the way ellis said。 i thought about my family and about him out there in his wheelchair in the old house and it just seemed to me that this country has got a strange kind of history and a damned bloody one too。 about anywhere you care to look。 i could stand back off and smile about such thoughts as them but i still have em。 i dont make excuses for the way i think。 not no more。 i talk to my daughter。
she would be thirty now。 thats all right。 i dont care how that sounds。 i like talkin to her。
call it superstition or whatever you want。 i know that over the years i have give her the heart i always wanted for myself and thats all right。 thats why i listen to her。 i know ill always get the best from her。 it dont get mixed up with my own ignorance or my own meanness。 i know how that sounds and i guess id have to say that i dont care。 i never even told my wife and we dont have a whole lot of secrets from one another。 i dont think shed say im crazy； but some might。 ed tom？ yeah； they had to swear out a lunacy warrant。 i hear theyre feedin him under the door。 thats all right。 i listen to what she says and what she says makes good sense。 i wish shed say more of it。 i can use all the help i can get。 well； thats enough of that。
when he walked in the house the phone was ringing。 sheriff bell； he said。 he made his way to the sideboard and picked up the phone。 sheriff bell； he said。
sheriff this is detective cook with the odessa police。
yessir。
theres a report we have here that is flagged with your name。 it has to do with a woman named carla jean moss that was murdered here back in march。
yessir。 i appreciate you callin。
they picked up the murder weapon off of the fbi ballistics database and they traced it down to a boy here in midland。 the boy says he got the gun out of a truck at a accident scene。 just seen it and took it。 and i expect thats right。 i talked to him。 he sold it and it turned up in a convenience store robbery in shreveport louisiana。 now the accident where he got the gun； it took place on the same day as the murder did。 the man that owned the gun left it in the truck and disappeared and he aint been heard from since。 so you can see where this is goin。 we dont get a lot of unsolved homicides up here and we damn sure dont like em。 can i ask you what was your interest in the case； sheriff？
bell told him。 cook listened。 then he gave him a number。 it was the investigator of the accident。 roger catron。 let me call him first。 hell talk to you。
thats all right； bell said。 hell talk to me。 ive known him for years。
he called the number and catron answered。
howre you doin ed tom。
i aint braggin。
what can i do you for。
bell told him about the wreck。 yessir； catron said。 sure i remember it。 there was two boys killed in that wreck。 we still aint found the driver of the other vehicle。
what happened？
boysd been smokin dope。 they run a stopsign and hit a brand new dodge pickup broadside。 totaled it out。 the old boy in the pickup he climbed out and just took off up the street。 fore we got there。 truck had been bought in mexico。 illegal。 no epa or nothin。 no registration。
what about the other vehicle。
there was three boys in it。 nineteen； twenty years old。 all of em mexican。 the only one lived was the one in the back seat。 apparently they was passin around a doober and they went through this intersection probably about sixty mile a hour and just t…boned the old boy in the truck。 the one in the passenger side of the car； he e through the windscreen head first and crossed the street and landed on a womans porch。 she was out puttin some mail in her box and he didnt miss her by much。 she set off down the street i