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little；andliftedhercloser
hefeltlikeaninecstasy
”thethingis；”shebegan；elt；butfearing
disaster；”thereareneverguaranteesinanyrelationship；becauseno
oneknoean；lookatrachel；perfectly
healthyonedayandatoseanotherthroughnosinglefaultofher
ohinkknowforsurei
an；youuldberunningdohestreetandbehitbyacar；and
zap；youregone；justlikethat礼odforbid；idontthatto
happen
steve；ihavebreastcancer”thereshouldhavebeenanabrupt
silenceentbutlifehadntstoppedtherewere
heartbeats；ongoingbreaths；andthehufthatchineinthewall
hedreenseyou
hadbreaste
””pasttenseyourecured”shedreosee
hiutneedingthedistance
”youknoiliarerrachels
apingintohospitalpersonnelwhoknewyou；
tooiputtogetherandcheckedourdatabase”
”soyprivacy”shecriedandawayif
hehadnthadhishandslockedatthesllofherback”thatsa
breachofethics；steve”
”probably；butieyou
anypartofihadtoknohis”why
didntyoutellyoukne
ithadtobethiseto
shareit”
”plainedsheso
tears
”itsbeenalongtisinceicaredenough”herbreastswereflush
aseveragainsthischest”lasttiidid；heduedassoonas
heleaed”
”doesitfeellikeionlyillholdingher；buthe
edtobelieve；oh；shedid
”ybeitsaperversion；”shettered
”noitsjustnotasbigathingasyouthink；katherineweall
havesothing”
”e；personally；now
nothingbutdaddiedatfortytatecancer；andhisdad
diedatfortyeightoflungethatfeels
likeiivingonborroe；aybee
tobegoodiboughtthecj7uedfiftyialeda
carlikethatifiguredthatifialreadydead；atoplesscar
e；andanttoknoething蘒lovethatcarits
probablythecheapestoneiveeveroiveneverenjoyed
drivinganotheraschitsjustplainfunyoufitinitwell”
”ihadrenstruedtoocheery
tohavegottentheadelovetoaan
hrenstructedbreasts””no；buttheydontfeelsobadright
nooretoyouthanyourbreasts；”hesaid；justasjack
had”iylineofo
knophasisontherightsyllable”
priorities
rachel”husbanduldnthackit
heuldntlook；uldnttouchheuldntgetanerection”
”idonthavethatproble”nohedidntatleast；notright
then
”talkingsdifferentfrooing”hecuppedherfaceinthedark
”totrynonoolaughshe
halfbelievedthathewould
”ihaveafeelingyourbreastsbotheryourethantheyllbother；
”hesaidhsuchgentlenessthatherhacklesuldntrise
itstruckherthatheghtberight
”tusyouoff；
ill
that”heile；”well；
alsttheres”esican
；ican”hetookadeep；shakybreath”therespleasureto
hehadfronereentoftheprocess”heducked
hisheadandcaughtherlipsinakissthatstartedinnocentlyenough
butquicklyescalated
katherinedidntknoanagedtodoithehadherasintothe
thingasheshe
shouldnthavebeenabletofeel；giventhecircutances；buthedid
tastedivine
herbreastsshehey
there
butshehereshearing
nedtobeolivehsalinegranted；theproof
ofthepuddingheeatingbutshehadnevergottenthisfar
before
ybe；justybe；thingswerelookingup
………………………………
第96节
ruscfiiaptertorethanaguyhe
thought；heanalyzed；heunderstoodheingforrachelto
talkracheltotalkalkedfirsttook
thegreaterrisk
thethinghatifhedidnttakeanyrisk；hewassureashell
goingtoenduphthekindoflifehehadjusthadthatlifewas
gray；foggy；zzy；dait
rachelslifehaddepthithadlorandthsheuldaffordto
tospeakshehadlesstoloseiftheyneverdid
soit
thathisbrainsaidhisheartsaidthatheuldntbareall
hthegirlsthere；andhegirlsthere；katherinewas；
orcharlie；orfaye；andthenthegirlsk
eveninghotheastroadheinthe
aerofasettingsunthatgildedeboulders；layer
afterlayerofgreeninghillsthereoitsbeauty；a
softthesurftellher；askher；begher；itsaid；
repeatingitsssagehtherushofthewaves
atthebankofilboxes；hetuedoffthehighartedupthe
hillifthessagehadntalreadybeeningrainedinhithecanyon
thewoodswhenhe
cliedfrohecar；justthatnaggingellher；
askher；begher
zl”uh”hestoppedonthefrontporchsanthaandhopewere
alreadyinside”heyuh”hopecabacktothedoor
”sohishair；feelingasudden
direneed”gosasanthacaupbehindhope
”listen；canyoutforyourselvesfora
babies；”santhasaid；butkindly”whereareyougoing”hewas
alreadyheadingba
”thedrivebaelaseasythesunsettheroadgrew
darkerhetuedonhisheadlights；buttheydidntshohe
neededtodoituntilhepassedthehighlandsandsahe
lightsofcarlacrossthebaythathehadaclue
rachelhoveredonthebrinkoftearsheachhourthatpassed；the
realityoftheaccident；thea；andthebloodclotsankindeeper
shehadneverbeenoodortality；butitwashard
nottonoanshethoughtabout
katherineandaboutfaithjustpicturingtheaveherstrength
sotherehat；andthegirls；andherkandjack
andrejacksheryingtoprocessallshehadbeentoldabout
hitryingtofigureoutandsheliked
puttingthingsinpilesshedidntcareifthereesshina
pile；aslongasthereblanceoforder；piletopile
sincethedivorce；shehadkeptjackinapileofhisoa
neatpiledozensofthoughtsandetionslyand
highforthestpart；shenagedtokeeptheeparatefrohe
restofherlifetheoccasionalspilloverained
thatwashowshesurvived
nohough；jackteredeveryouchedthegirlshe
touel；touchedthehousein
bigsur；touchedduncanandfaithhetouchedherwork
lsheessingthings
up
sheuldntunthoseotherpeopleandthings
thenheappearedatthedoortoherroondherheartvedrightup
toherthroatshesitdidntbudge
”hi；”hesaidafterseveralsendsonthethreshold；heca
inside
”idroppedthegirlsbackho”heputhishandsonhishipsand
lookedaroundtheroothenhiseyesretuedtohers
saysothing；shetoldherself；butherthroatlosedandhereyes
istsaysothing；she
”ithoughtybe”hebeganandclearedhisthroat”iknos
lateell；thereshetookabreathandaskedstraightout；”doyou
totakearide”shehadntexpectedthatthetearshungon
herlidssothingrethanherthroatsqueezedherheartstanding
there；allsixtithhissportshirt